Meet my new Cattorneys. They help me deal with the stupid.

I now have a legal team helping me manage the blog, along with any complaints or threats of lawsuits (of which there are many).

Just recently I had this gem of an email exchange:

from:		sistahstar91@--------
to:		cj@thiscrazytrain.com
date:		Sat, Mar 16, 2013 at 1:11 PM
subject:		pic

You stole my picture of Google. You had no right to use my picture and in Canada we have copyright laws and I looked up common licence and you have to pay me to use my picture. Please let me know where I can send the bill.

from:		cj@thiscrazytrain.com
to:		sistahstar91@--------
date:		Sat, Mar 16, 2013 at 1:30 PM
subject:		Re: pic

Hi,
For God's sake, why didn't you attach your bill to your email? I am a very busy person and do not have time for such shenanigans. I don't even like your picture of Google.

from:		sistahstar91@--------
to:		cj@thiscrazytrain.com
date:		Sat, Mar 16, 2013 at 3:03 PM
subject:		Re: pic

I am giving you a chance to remove the photo. I am looking into how much I should charge you if you don't do it. I will get back to you.
Bye.

from:		cj@thiscrazytrain.com
to:		sistahstar91@--------
date:		Sat, Mar 16, 2013 at 3:05 PM
subject:		Re: pic

Can I ask you a question? Does your house have wheels?

from:		sistahstar91@--------
to:		cj@thiscrazytrain.com
date:		Mon, Apr 08, 2013 at 7:20 PM
subject:		Re: pic

Hello.....it has been three weeks and my photo is still on your site. You now owe me $800. Please let me know where I can mail the bill.

from:		cj@thiscrazytrain.com
to:		sistahstar91@--------
date:		Mon, Apr 08, 2013 at 9:44 PM
subject:		Re: pic

Just PDF it and send it by email. Or, you can send it to the attention of my law firm
Greyskull & Clark
PO Box 1245
L1E 3N9

As you can see, they are anxiously awaiting the bill. These clowns need to something to do or else I am literally paying for them to lie around all day.

from:		sistahstar91@--------
to:		cj@thiscrazytrain.com
date:		Mon, Apr 08, 2013 at 9:56 PM
subject:		Re: pic

I will be contacting a REAL lawyer.

Never knew Grave Digger was a Toronto commuter

Whiby GO Station
Photo Credit: @joel_sko

Presented without comment

Photo credit: @xojustlivelifexo

GO piloting WI-FI service at Clarkson and Pickering Stations

UPDATE:
The Toronto Star covered this in an article this afternoon but YOU HEARD IT HERE FIRST. Remember that. This squirrel... this squirrel brought you that nut.

Earlier this morning:
This pilot project provides services in the stations and on platforms.
The service is free. More stations are expected to come online during the year.
For more info, check out www.gotransit.com/public/en/travelling/WiFi.aspx

Is this abusive? Video shows York Region Transit special constable arresting fare jumper

Apparently she was tackled by the special constable and the person who recorded the video was quoted as saying, "I wouldn’t want to see an animal treated like that".

A spokesperson for York Region Transit told the Toronto Star, “The only time a fare violation would escalate is if a customer fails to lawfully comply. But it wouldn’t normally (escalate).”

The special constable has been reassigned to administrative duties and the incident is being investigated.

The Toronto Star has more on the story.

 

This woman attends meetings at work the same way I bet

The train is NOT your living room and no one wants to look at your dirty sport socks, either.

- Submitted

You could use some more sleep

Don't mind if I do!

- Submitted

Ever tried to help someone out only to make the situation worse?

This morning I noticed one of my bus mates standing at the lights instead of the bus stop.
It looked like he was heading back home so I asked him what was wrong thinking our bus had blown by early again and he'd given up on GO Transit. This has been the pattern over the past several weeks.
Our bus is scheduled to arrive at 6:38 am. On Easter Monday, the bus was 10 minutes early and the driver didn't even stop at the stop according to my other bus stop buddies who were walking towards the bus stop when the bus blew by. Everyone on that route had been forced to take the next bus.
On March 28th, the bus was five minutes early, but I requested the driver sit and wait until he was back on schedule. This morning the driver was running seven minutes early and we asked him to wait at another stop and get back on schedule. It screws over a lot of people when drivers run early.
Anyone who takes a bus knows it's all about routine. We build our mornings and our walks to the bus stops around this routine. If a bus is scheduled to arrive at 6:38 and the driver is running early, that driver should take pains to get back on schedule. It's only fair.
My bus mate tells me it's not the bus but that he had left his Presto card in his other jacket and had to go back home and fetch it.
I told him not to bother. I carry an extra Presto card and he could use it. There's money on it (or so I thought...).
The bus comes. We get on and my bus mate gets a card error. We can only presume it's because the card has no funds or is locked. The driver stares blankly at us.
I'm embarrassed and the card won't tap again. I had already tapped my card so I couldn't pay for my bus mate out of my e-wallet.
Myself, my bus mate and another bus mate all start scrounging around in our purses and bags to come up with enough fare to get him to the station where he could then square out the rest of his fare at the tellers with his debit card.
He was grateful but I was mortified. So much drama!

To the girl crying on the 4:53 LSE train yesterday

I doubt you're a fan. You probably will never read this but if you do, whatever had you hurting so bad, I hope you get through it. I'm sorry I didn't have any tissues to offer but I am grateful another lady did. I may want to chop people's legs off with chainsaws but there's a heart deep down in my commuter-hating soul.

Apparently the man on crutches will be running

Thanks @jennamassacre for the chuckle.

This guy (Like a boss!)

Source

New Lakeshore East GO Train & Bus Services Coming Soon

From a GO Transit email blast:

Lakeshore East Line GO Train & Bus Passengers: We're happy to announce that we'll be introducing new weekday train and bus services on your line. Starting Monday, April 8th, you'll have two new Toronto-bound train trips from Oshawa GO at 10:08 and 16:08; and two new eastbound trains departing Union back to Oshawa at 08:43 and 14:43. Bus connections will be provided to and from Newcastle and there will be some minor adjustments to some of our other services to make room for the new trains.

Additionally, the westbound train trip that currently departs Pickering GO at 07:45 will leave ten minutes later at 07:55, and the 07:21 train trip departure from Oshawa to Union at 07:21 will leave seven minutes later at 07:26. The departure times at stations stops along the line will also be adjusted, along with bus connections.

For more details, please visit the 'GO schedule changes' section at gotransit.com or click the following link: http://www.gotransit.com/public/en/updates/schedulechanges.aspx#April

Is that gay porn?!

So there I was ... on the train last night, minding my own business and watching episode 9 of Season Three of True Blood on my phone. Up comes a sexually graphic scene involving two male vampires when the woman next to me blurts out, "What is that?"

I didn't realize she'd been watching along with me.

I ripped out an earbud. She tilts her body to face me. "Is that gay porn?"
Thankfully she whispered this question.

I really should have trolled the shit of the situation by answering yes but I didn't. I know you're disappointed. I really missed a golden opportunity.

"It's True Blood. It's an HBO series," I tell her.

"Oh", she says. "Television sure has changed".

I was still stuck on the gay porn part. I wonder what would have happened if I said yes.

From the horse's mouth - how to pay for transit expansion across the GTA

Metrolinx Releases Short List of Proposed Investment Tools for Consultation

TORONTO, April 2, 2013 /CNW/ - Metrolinx has released a short list of investment tools for consultation that will help decide how transit expansion is funded in the years ahead.

Metrolinx is developing an investment strategy to help finance The Big Move and the next wave of projects including the Downtown Relief Line, the Yonge Subway Extension into York Region, new rapid transit in Mississauga, Brampton, Hamilton, new bus rapid transit corridors in Halton, Peel, Toronto and Durham, and major changes to the GO Transit rail network, municipal transit projects, roads and highways and green transportation options, such as cycling and walking.

Metrolinx examined over 25 investment options—strategies and investment tools to fund transit—that are used in other jurisdictions and received input through a series of 12 round table meetings with residents across the GTHA on ways to fund public transit.

"We want to continue our conversation with municipalities, stakeholders and the public to help us deliver our investment strategy," said Metrolinx CEO Bruce McCuaig.

Metrolinx is considering the following investment options for additional consultation:

• Development Charges
• Employer Payroll Tax
• Fuel Tax
• High Occupancy Tolls (HOT)
• Highway Tolls
• Land Value Capture
• Parking Space Levy, including pay-for-parking at transit stations
• Property Tax
• Sales Tax
• Transit Fare Increase
• Vehicle Kilometres Travelled (VKT) Fee

"At our round table meetings, we heard that there is wide recognition of the problem of congestion and there is impatience for a solution," said Metrolinx CEO Bruce McCuaig. "Participants want to see more transit and transportation expansion, they understand that this requires significant investment and overall they supported tools to build new transit and transportation."

Metrolinx is required to provide advice on investment tools to the Ontario government and GTHA municipalities through an investment strategy. The investment strategy, to be released by June 1, will provide funding options for implementation of The Big Move, Metrolinx's regional transportation plan.

Metrolinx is working to provide residents and businesses in the GTHA with a transportation system that is modern, efficient and integrated. Find out more about The Big Move at www.bigmove.ca.

SOURCE: Metrolinx

Don't mind me, I'll just sit here while you bake your stank

- Instagram

TTC introduces personal subway cars

How you know Spring has come to the GO train

- Submitted

This made my morning

Were you on the 4:30 or 5:10 afternoon trains yesterday?

Both trains were brought to a standstill when encountering a stalled train outside of Pickering. I was on the 5:10 and submitted a Service Guarantee credit.

You can request a credit by filling out this form on GO's website. I would suggest you click the "Does my trip qualify?" button first before submitting a request.

What's interesting is that passengers who were on the train that experienced engine failure (4:25) have been told a decision about credit eligibility is pending.

Not an axe, blowtorch or chainsaw

I'm gonna sit on the train and stare menacingly at foot riders and bag riders while slapping this spatula against an open palm. Imma slap you across the thigh! Weapon of choice, right here.

Actually, as nice of a Scooby-Doo fantasy that is, I bought this spatula to replace the piece of crap Starfrit  spatula I had. It broke in two last night while I was folding blueberries into a banana bread mixture. It was a spatula classified for use in dense dough and heavy mixing. Lies!

Eff you, Starfrit. You piece of junk.

Whilst at the Bay, I was giggling to myself while perusing all the spatulas and thinking about riding the train home with my purchase and what I could do with it. I'd totally do it... but I don't like jail.