I swear there are forces that work against me

For the past couple of weeks, I had noticed that my Samsung Galaxy Note was really, really, really slow to charge.

I own other Samsung devices so I started swapping out cables and wall chargers but no dice, the phone still took over 12 hours to fully charge. I called Rogers who told me to call stores that accept repairs and make sure loaner Android phones were available before I brought the device in.

As of Friday, I was ready to go phone-less entirely if it meant remedying the situation.

Today, despite my MacGuyver method of balancing the phone on the edge of my desk and using a coffee cup to weigh down the cable so it bent at a 15 degree angle, which is how the phone would charge at all, the phone finally decided to quit this bitch. It died a slow, ugly death at 2 pm this afternoon.

After spreading the word around the office about my wireless woes, a colleague gave me her old BlackBerry circa 2006. I am so rocking this beast.

It's pretty awful. First world problems right here, folks.

Out of 12 Rogers stores, seven of those being within a 55-minute drive from my home and the rest being in the downtown core, only one had loaner phones and none of them were Android. Beggars can't be choosers, so I took my colleague's BlackBerry which required no $50 deposit.

At the very least, I can still watch episodes of Breaking Bad, which is what will save me from complete and total boredom on the train/bus rides for the next two weeks.  What I can't do is Tweet, Facebook, blog, surf, play Candy Crush Saga, cream my friends in Scrabble or slaughter pigs. Without a BlackBerry plan, I have no data.

All this and still paying $64.99 a month!

I have no idea why the phone decided to circumcise itself. I just hope it can be fixed.

I have a friend who went through this with her iPhone. Turns out something had come loose inside the phone and it was welded back on or something like that. I'm hoping my problem is that simple. I didn't realize how attached I had become to this phone.

I really miss it. The train ride home was torture.

Just so you know this isn't a battle I wage on my own. There are soldiers who fight this fight with me (passively, of course)

Parking donkeys! I have found your leader

The person who emailed this to me (K.L.) swears on a stack of newborn babies this is legit. It happened at Maple GO Station last week.

Despite numerous available spots, clearly noticeable in the photo, the mentally challenged owner of this KIA parked and left the car right where it sits.

If this doesn't justify a towing, I really would like to know what sets the bar for GO Transit Safety personnel, considering all the recent emails I've gotten lately about "practicing safe parking". 

This person didn't even try.

You know what this needs? HULK SMASH!

Here are some other donkeys photographed elsewhere at GO train stations.

So much for colouring between the lines.

There's a Blogger app

I just learned this.

Previously, I would try to blog from my phone but it was awkward and buggy. Now there's an app for that. 

Let's do a test run, shall we?

What was annoying about this train ride is this lady had rested her wet umbrella on the arm rest between us and when I asked her to move it, she asked me if it was bothering her.

That's when I got out my blow torch.

Needless to say, the umbrella is no longer an issue but the right side of my pant leg is wet.

What's wrong with people? Are you that far into your bubble?

People like this woman:
 

Put your goddamn shoes on and keep your feet on the floor!

Holy Christ.

We are not in your living room.

So this greeted me this morning

(7:53 am OSH - UNST)

Nothing beats staring at this during the train ride home

I mean, why even bother with "shorts"?

You stay classy girlfriend.

- Submitted (regretfully)

Pyromania

During Tuesday night's GO bus ride home, a young MAN (not a kid) was at the back of the bus lighting matches and blowing them out. It didn't take long for the bus to fill with the smell of sulfur.

I was fucking pissed.

Who does that? On a fucking bus with one exit and full of people?

I'm not giving any more details other than to say the situation was handled very poorly. It resulted in me phoning the police when I exited the bus well before my stop.

At one point, this pyromaniac, who looked to be about 20, was called "a kid" and his match lighting was described as something "kids do".

Please.

Boys younger than this douchebag went off to war.

There's more than just footriding in this picture

Someone also left DNA behind.

Kudos to PK for zoom.

As gross as it is ... look at alll the money in this one shot.

Marketing transit safety. You're doing it right

On August 28th, Metrolinx CEO Bruce McCuaig was a guest columnist in the Toronto Sun

He wrote an Opinion piece that reads like a Manifesto.

I have respect for the guy but he works for the Province of Ontario and we've all learned from past mishaps and mishandling of large projects that this province's government is as efficient and transparent as a snail in mud.

In fact, after reading through his chest thumping, I couldn't help but feel insulted both as a Presto customer and a GO Transit passenger.

He claims everyone deserves to be consulted and Metrolinx has followed through on this transparency by holding focus groups to collect feedback from passengers about changes and improvements to GO Transit and its website. One of those focus groups was to discuss the online schedule changes page which GO was in the process of redesigning and improving.

One person in the group wrote to tell me he was paid $75 for his time and input only to learn when the new schedule page was officially launched, none of the recommendations, changes or suggested improvements made by the group had been implemented. The schedule application was launched looking exactly the way it did when the group was first introduced to it.

Adding further insult to injury, on July 24th, just mere days after the new schedule application was launched, it failed to work. I was emailed by half a dozen passengers expressing frustration with the Schedule Finder. I was sent screenshots with detailed explanations that routes weren't appearing, train times were blank and after several minutes of waiting, no results would appear. By the following Monday, the application appeared to have been fixed. So much for stress testing before a launch!

But it's still not perfect. Last week, Twitter exploded with tweeted frustrations from university and college students new to the system who find the schedule finder application confusing and not user-friendly. One person joked he hitched his way to Humber College because he gave up trying to understand what train and bus connection he needed to make to get to school. Even I have trouble with the bus schedules.

McCuaig writes there are more than 750,000 Presto cards in use on the system. He admits the numbers involved in the Presto project are "huge" resulting in 122 million "taps" and $479 million in fares and yet, yet ... Presto still holds GO Transit passengers' money hostage. Presto takes our money but often leaves us holding an empty bag in return. McCuaig seems to have forgotten about 2011's autoload malfuction where passengers' credit cards were charged repeatedly in a 48-hour timeframe but the money failed to show up anywhere where Presto could find it. Presto is far from a success and nothing to brag about.

He also doesn't mention that GO Transit forced its five times weekly ridership into using Presto and for many of us, we played along very unwillingly. One only has to spend an hour or two on Twitter to read about all the Presto pains, muddled information and nonsense customers have had to put up with. No need to pay a focus group for that "valuable" feedback.

As of right now, there was a widespread system glitch affecting the Presto website on September 8th that resulted in passengers who used the online load feature to put money into their Presto e-wallets to have no updated balance.  Once debited from passengers' bank accounts, this money failed to make its way into e-wallets. Passengers have been out these funds since Sunday and have had to go into stations to deposit more money into their e-wallets so they could have funds available to get to work. Worse, Presto can't even commit to a timeframe as to when these passengers will see the funds they transferred on Sunday in their Presto accounts. This is wrong. It should be illegal for any corporation to withhold funds from customers who made these transactions in good faith. For some passengers, these screw-ups cause financial hardship and inconvenience. Equally unimpressive is when GO Transit CSRs remind passengers to deposit funds at the counter at stations in order to avoid these delays. For months GO Transit promoted Presto as an ALTERNATIVE to lining up at the station and touted the fact that we could all use an online system to load the card. In fact, this was marketed as one of the benefits of Presto. And when it does work, we have to wait up to 24 hours for the funds to be deposited into our Presto accounts. Yet, I can get a coffee card from Starbucks, load it online right now with $25 and use those funds immediately.

There are claims in emails from GO Transit that Metrolinx listens to its passengers and in July, GO Transit rolled out the Quiet Zone "pilot" project across the system to respond to requests for "quiet cars". This is a project that involves no real effort on behalf of GO, other than having printed up some signs and brochures.

CSAs are instructed to give announcements during rush hour about the Quiet Zone, but provide no verbal instructions about what is expected of passengers and give no information about what it is. And for some reason, GO decided to launch this project during the summer months when the Exhibition is in full swing and tourists and families are on board. What transpired was a complete and total shit show. It got so bad that accounts were created on Twitter to mock the project and passengers were left to enforce the rules, resulting in one fist fight on August 23rd where Transit Security had to escort two passengers off the platform at Union Station from a rush hour LSE train, according to Twitter user @GregCrone.

On the Richmond Hill line, the CSAs have stopped making announcements entirely. On my line, the Lakeshore East, only one announcement was made shortly after we left Oshawa at 7:15 am this morning, and nothing after that. On the ride home last night, on the 5:10 pm train, no announcements were made.

GO Transit passengers still deserve better.

Sorry Bruce, but you've got a lot more work to do. I know your hands are tied with bureaucratic red tape on a lot of this stuff, but you really need to address the Presto problems and the GO Transit website's lack of ease of use.

If you truly want us to believe Metrolinx listens to customers, please review the recommendations that were made by the focus groups and actually put them into practice. Then you'll have me on-board in believing you when you say you are willing to use every tool available to provide effective communication, but not just about projects, but the GO system itself. Email alerts about system interruptions, delays and buses that disappear from routes due to "operational errors" should be immediate, not an hour after the delay happened or long after it's been cleared. Sometimes we don't get any information at all about why a train was late or why a bus never showed up.

Metrolinx can do better.

Girl sits on bus. Girl takes photos of herself giving duck face for entire bus ride

Photo courtesy of Stef S.

STAND BACK BEHIND THE YELLOW LINE YOU DONK---, oh wait ...

If you've ever filed a complaint with Metrolinx, you'll understand...

from:		CC
to:		"cj@thiscrazytrain.com"
date:		Sat, Sep 7, 2013 at 9:23 AM
subject:		Perhaps one of your blog readers?

Hey CJ,
Thought you'd enjoy this little bit of rebellious consumer-related frustration, vented in blue ink, that I spotted on the Yorkdale bus this morning.
This was scrawled on that "GO's Passenger Charter" notice at the front of every bus telling you all the glorious features of GO's customer service. It seems they've penned their own disclaimer.
It reads: "Charter to be used only when convenient to Metrolinx."
Stickin' it to the man, indeed.

Rode a DD this morning

Didn't like it.

There are LCD monitors inside the bus. Why is there no entertainment? I had to stare at the GO Transit logo for the entire ride.

Boooooooring! 

At they very least, they could have this video on loop or any one of these videos. Christ, I could listen to Richard talk about how much he loves being a CSA all damn day.

 

Sorry for the glare but the glare is where the monitors are.

Secondly, the seats are terrible. There is no cushioned comfort. You don't sink into these things like you would into a giant marshmallow like the regular GO buses. Nothing reclines. There's no bungy basket in front of you to put your shit in and worse, WORSE, is that if you want to turn on the overhead light, YOU HAVE TO STAND THE HELL UP.

At this point, if I had an abuela, she'd be crossing herself and changing the channel. She'd be so done with this mess.

There is no way in hell I could stand more than 30 minutes on one of these things. The top level gave me vertigo when the driver rounded the corner of the bus loop into the GO Station, so I won't be sitting up there any time soon. I almost tasted my breakfast again.

Blech.

These things can go right back to Scotland for all I care.

I'm calling them Ghetto Sleds from now on.

Part 3 of a new installment, exclusive to This Crazy Train, "Meet the Deckers"

Editor's note: If you have safety concerns about Double Decker buses, drop me a line cj@thiscrazytrain.com

Read Parts 1 and 2

Photo from GO Transit's official Facebook page

Special to This Crazy Train

What would Ralph Nader say?
by Ali Gator (not his real name)

In this segment of the series, Meet the Deckers, I look at safety concerns with the Alexander Dennis Ltd. (ADL) double-decker (DD) buses that GO Transit has deployed on Route 12, between Niagara Falls and Burlington GO Transit stations.  Let me start by saying that I have not been involved in any incident that has caused bodily injury to myself or others while commuting on these buses.  What other passengers and I fear are what will happen should a mishap occur with one of these buses on the QEW.  Let me say that I have the utmost regard for the drivers on Route 12; their track record is not under scrutiny.

So what are the concerns?

From the first day I travelled on an ADL DD in June of 2011, I was convinced it was a bus suited for intra-city commuters, not inter-city travellers/tourists.  Route 12 draws much tourist traffic with folks heading to Niagara Falls, especially in summer, and with that comes luggage, strollers and bicycles – and plenty of them.  Unlike the traditional MCI coaches, the double-deckers have negligible cargo capacity.  Items that are normally stored underneath the bus on a MCI model are brought on board a DD.

The cargo area is essentially the luggage rack over the front wheel well.  This picture shows an average amount of luggage, four strollers, each with an infant.   On the QEW, the bus can reach speeds of up to 109 km/hr.  Note how low the seat backs are in comparison to those on a MCI bus.

When the luggage rack is full, suitcases, etc. overflow into the accessibility area as shown in the photo above.  Occasionally, a suitcase on wheels will break away from the pack and roll down the aisle.  Have you ever seen a happier group of passengers?

Did I mention bicycles?  When the bike rack is full, supervisors authorize drivers to allow bicycles inside the bus with passengers.  This one doesn’t look to be secured with bungee cords or duct tape, does it?

And what happens when a driver is required to transport nine bicycles?  Well, two are mounted on the bike rack, three go in the rear cargo closet, four ride inside the bus, the trip is delayed, the train connection in Burlington is missed, and passengers are very unhappy

You’re probably wondering, what’s all this all leading to?  The QEW is very unforgiving when something goes wrong.  I was on an early morning bus to Burlington when we came upon this collision that had happened shortly before we got to the scene: Woman killed by flying tire on Ontario highway.  Earlier this year, the QEW near St. Catharines was closed because of this fatal crash.  Both these fatalities would have turned baggage and bicycles into projectiles within the bus.  Even a lesser crash, like this one – which turned the Niagara bound lanes into a salad bar – would have wreaked havoc on board the bus.

I know what you’re thinking.  Weren’t the double-deckers modified to have a cargo bay (of sorts) added to the back of the bus?  You’re absolutely right!  However, that cargo bay is rarely used because of safety concerns for the drivers.  I’ll address the “cargo closet” in a future article.

So, with all that stuff crammed inside the bus, how do these double-deckers manage to conform to the PublicVehicles Act?  You know, the part that says:

17. Where a public vehicle is used for the transportation of passengers or express freight, the licensee shall provide accommodation therefor so that there is no interference with the free and ready ingress and egress of passengers to and from the vehicle and the accommodation shall be so constructed as to prevent the property or freight from injuring a passenger.  R.R.O. 1990, Reg. 982, s. 17.

They obviously don't ... unless there are exceptions I don't know about.

Scary stuff, right?

If any of you reading are highly knowledgeable (in the legal sense) of traffic laws and the Act, your input is welcome.

Let's move on.

The decorative aluminum strip on the driver’s door has sharp burrs on the corners.  Two drivers showed me the gouges they received when they brushed against these corners.  And we all know what job-related injuries mean – WSIB paperwork!

Whereas MCI buses allow up to 19 standing passengers, for safety reasons, none are allowed to stand on double-deckers – anywhere.  The following photo shows three standing passengers; two on the stairs – a definite no-no!  I’ve heard reports of triple that number standing.

OC Transpo in Ottawa also operates ADL double-decker buses in their fleet.  Last winter, two DDs were blown off Woodroffe Avenue.  Per this CBC article, the buses will not operate on that municipal road this coming winter.  The union representing the transit workers was quite vociferous in influencing that decision.

Imagine this in green and white …(click here for the CBC story and video)

In 2011 and 2012, GO Transit operated the double-deckers on Route 12 only during the summer months.  I’ve asked the drivers when the DDs are leaving this year, and I’ve been told that they’re staying.  In spite of what happened in Ottawa, it appears Metrolinx has decided to run those buses at freeway speeds across the windswept Burlington and Garden City Skyway bridges during the periods of what is the worst weather in the Golden Horseshoe.  Why?  As far as I know, the GO Transit bus drivers’ union has remained mum on this matter.  Will it take an incident on the QEW to force a discussion? Why are brass waiting for something to happen?!

Recently, I received an invitation to take another Let GO Know survey.  GO Transit wants to initiate yet another “pilot program” - this one to install a digital Audio Video Recording System (AVRS) on some double-decker buses.  Yes, Big Brother is coming to a DD on a route near you.  Supposedly, recording everything we say and do on the bus will make the trips safer for us.  The introduction to the survey never   explained how increased safety would be achieved.

If you completed the survey and can explain how electronic surveillance equipment will mitigate the issues I've outlined, could you share your insights, please?

My word. What would Ralph Nader say? 

The one about a Niagara Falls bus ride

from:		Janine
to:		cj@thiscrazytrain.com
date:		Fri, Sep 6, 2013 at 8:52 PM
subject:		Excellent customer service!

Hi! I came across your blog and figured you would want to know what a fabulous things GO Transit did for a friend of mine! My friend was heading for the train to Niagara Falls a weekend or so again at Union and she missed the last train. She was franctic. Well wouldn't you know that arrangements were made to have a bus take her there so she could get home. Isn't that amazing? It was customer service at its finest. Made me a GO customer for life, I tell ya.
If you use this, please just use my first name.

from:		C.J. Smith
to:		Janine
date:		Fri, Sep 6, 2013 at 9:06 PM
subject:		Re: Excellent customer service!

Sorry, what?
So your friend missed the train and you're telling me GO Transit summoned up a bus to drive her to Niagara Falls from downtown Toronto?! Was this a bus in service or did they actually put a bus in service for her? Sure, that's great customer service but at what cost?
I would think a cab would have been cheaper or a night's stay at a downtown Toronto hotel.
Your friend does realize that GO is funded by taxpayer dollars and the fare thousands of us pay to ride the buses and trains.
Don't get me wrong. It's wonderful GO helped her out but the expense was unnecessary, unwarranted and a waste of money. Unless it was a matter there was a bus going there anyway, then I don't see what was so great about what GO did.
Hit me back with more deets.

Cj

---

I never heard back from Janine so I don't know if this story is true, is missing a whole bunch of facts, or she misunderstood how this trip went down. If it's true and it was a bus put solely into service to drive a woman home for two hours there and return, then this is a complete waste of tax dollars. It would have not been worth the almost $18 fare, especially if she was the only passenger on the bus!
I'd love to know what made her so important for this happen.

It's probably not true. It better not be true.

Indecent exposure

Some guy  tweeted a picture of himself holding his junk on a GO train on Twitter.

I was sent a link to the photo (on Twitter).  There is not enough bleach in Canada for my eyes after seeing that. If you're crafty and savvy enough, you should be able to figure out how you see it yourself, if you're so inclined and be warned, the photo is NOT SAFE FOR WORK (NSFW). I think I posted enough clues ...(cough I have a Twitter feed to the right of the post cough)

Not sure what the laws are around this. My lawyercats know nothing about this topic seeing that it is indecent exposure ALL THE TIME in my house. Those jerks don't even wear pants for cripes sake.

I'm back. Time to get this dog and pony show back on the road

Ahhhhh, it was so nice... Vacation.

Got some work done around the house. Discovered I can't paint 10-foot tall porch columns. Window washing blows and cleaning out the rubber ring on a front loading washing machine is worse than pulling out rotting, human hair out of a bath tub drain. Dry heaves upon dry heaves.

But I did it, and my washer smells a thousands times better.

I played way too much online Scrabble, Angry Birds and Candy Crush Saga and walked a total of 40 kilometres. I didn't eat away my vacation. Instead, I lost another two pounds. My total weight loss in the past 25 months stands at 57 pounds. I have lost an entire six year old!

I looked forward to coming back to work so I can break my Candy Crash Saga dependency, although I tried really hard not to play an episode on the train. The ride was uneventful and extremely quiet in the Quiet Zone, which was good, because I'm not afraid to break fingers.

I have a lot of catching up to do with respect to submitted content for this site, so hold tight, calm your tits and I'll get this show back on stage.

Don't care if it's late at night, you're still a donkey

Nope. Don't wanna see your pedicure

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