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Thursday, December 10, 2009

Overheard snow tire conversation

"So I had to go over to my in-laws and use their garage to put snow tires on my wife's Jeep last night," says man to his friend.
"Did you put them on your car, too?" asks his friend.
"No," says the man, laughing.
"Real men don't need snow tires".

Tuesday, December 1, 2009

Celine Dion

Dude in a suit across from me on the train is listening to Celine Dion at full volume. Is it disturbing that I recognize her music? Yes, yes it is. OMG, now he's swaying back and forth! Cue lighter ...

Monday, November 2, 2009

Pen

Can't stand it when people click their pens open and shut continuously on the train. Can I stab this lady in the hand with her pen or am I just having a bad day!?

Tuesday, October 6, 2009

Lady Lumps

The lady on the train across from me needs to hide her lady lumps.

Wednesday, September 9, 2009

Loveseat

Her boobs were so big, it looked like she had a loveseat strapped to her chest!

Thursday, August 27, 2009

It ain't winter

Thinks all of you wearing fall jackets and winter coats on the train this morning are out of your goddamn minds. It's cooler, sure, but it ain't winter.

Friday, August 14, 2009

$50

Dropped a fifty note and a dude hunted me down at Union Station to give it back to me! Wow!

Tuesday, July 14, 2009

Brick

On the ride home, a group of teens just outside of the Danforth station threw a brick at the train as it sped by at a speed of 110 km/hr. The brick made contact with the window next to where I was sitting. The sound it made left my ear ringing and when I realized what had happened, I felt dizzy and sick because if it wasn't for the interior pane of glass to absorb the remaining force of the impact, I'd probably not be here right now or would have been seriously injured.

I no longer can make myself sit in a window seat and this incident has only further convinced me that we are becoming more of a society made up of people who are morally bankrupt.

Thursday, July 9, 2009

Pits

Holy moses! For the love of all things holy .... PLEASE WASH YOUR PITS! How can you not smell yourself?!

Tuesday, June 30, 2009

$260

Considering I pay $260 a month to ride the Go Train, is it too much to ask for people to shut up in the morning?

Saturday, May 9, 2009

Joaquin Phoenix

I rode the GO train with Joaquin Phoenix tonight.

3-inch heels

The whole train has noticed I can't walk in three-inch heels and I'm now barefoot.

Friday, January 9, 2009

Ow

Just fell down all the steps from the top compartment to the bottom after this a-hole with a dead body stuffed in his knapsack knocked me off balance. I am unable to sit as my ass is frozen from pain and now I must stand the whole ride to Oshawa from Union.