Thursday, February 26, 2015

Lie about me in front of a group of strangers and guarantee I'll verbally slap your hand

I know we've talked about this before:

Two doors and everyone goes through one and no one bothers to open the other door, so we wind up bottlenecked. The worst is when this happens at the bottom of the stairs of Platforms 10-13 leading to the Air Canada Centre walkway.

This happened this morning. Not a single person of the eight people or so crowded at the bottom could be bothered to pull open the door on the right. So I got in front of this woman, pulled the door open and said loudly and on purpose, "There are two doors, you know." As I walked through, she shouted after me, "Yeah okay, but you didn't have to hit me with the door!" 

I. DID. NOT. HIT. HER. WITH. THE. DOOR.  (Insert rage building.)

I was having none of her crap. None. She wanted to dance, I gave her a tango.

I whirled around and told her flat out, "The door did not hit you, you're just upset I called you out for being lazy and inconsiderate." Which is true. Don't tell me it's not true. She stood there and called out butt hurt because she knows she was in the wrong.

I heard some people snicker. Some people turned to witness our exchange. Good. Did she want me to tap her on the shoulder and beg her to open the door? No way. We're adults. Use your manners. 

Since we were walking in the same direction, we fired off a few more barbs at each other and then she flipped me the bird over her head as she pushed her way into the crowd to add distance between us.

Her red coat made her easy to follow. I caught up with her as the crowd moved out of the Royal Bank Plaza.

I told her not once did I swear or show a vulgar gesture. I headed off to where I needed to go. She called out after me to "Get a fucking life". Nice, huh?

When I've pointed out that there's a second door to others in the past, people will open it or mumble an apology. This woman didn't feel she should do anyone a favor, especially me, but don't lie and say I physically did something to you. Not cool. 


Anonymous said...

Yep. She only reacted the way she did because butthurt.

Bicky said...

I like when there's eight (8!) doors and people proceed to jam through one. *eyeroll*

I once held a door a woman who was behind me and she proceeded to go through it without holding it for the next lady. What a princess!

C.J. Smith said...

I think it's Squiggles who identified the scooters. They're the ones who slide through a closing door, letting it shut in your face. I secretly want to punch those people in the back of the head.

Seriously, this causes some serious pedestrian rage!

Squiggles said...

I remember commenting on it and secretly waiting for the day that they are smacked in the face because they cannot be bothered to open a friggin' door. But I am not certain I was the first.

Oh well. I am glad you called her out. Not that she will change any behaviour, because she is special and entitled and the door has cooties. But maybe, just maybe, she will consider opening a door.

C.J. Smith said...

I doubt it. I bet she'll be looking for me tomorrow. I'm pretty certain she's not done.

Squiggles said...

Occasionally, I have moments of complete naivety, where I want to believe everyone will grow up to be considerate, caring adults.

Then I take the GO and the PATH and realise that reality will never happen.


TT said...

I avoid the PATH on all but the coldest days. I hate it down there, perfect example of "everyone for themselves".

deepfish said...

It seems to be a remarkably prevalent thing in Toronto - I never saw this to the same degree in Montreal, Boston, New York, Chicago, Tokyo or Seoul or any of the other cities I've been in... But it was quite noticeable to me in my first few weeks living in Toronto.
I remarked on it to a friend - people in the PATH seem to lose use of their forearms as they near doors.
I once came up to a bank of doors in PATH with a double baby carriage. There were no crowds, it was the middle of the afternoon. I approached the doors and saw someone waiting on the other side...
The guy didn't open the door - that's a given. But he actually stood there tapping his toe impatiently waiting for ME to open one of the doors. When I opened the door, he actually brushed by me muttering.
And its getting worse. It appears to be a cultural trait that is deeply ingrained here.
I was exiting one of the seminar rooms here at school just today and two kids tried to barge their way in, actually shoulder checking me out of the way (or trying to - I'm a big guy). I yelled for them to stop - actually had to repeat two or three times.
I got the kids to go back outside then asked them if they knew what they had done wrong. They hadn't the foggiest idea,I I asked if they knew that they had done something rude - not a clue. I asked what they were supposed to do when trying to pass someone who was in their way if there wasn't enough room... they had no inkling that what they did usually - barge and elbow - was in any way unacceptable.
Something is definitely broken. These kids have no idea how to be courteous and respect any kind of standards or social contract.
Welcome to the future of Toronto.

Dave said...

One possibility is the sheep dont want to touch the door handles to avoid getting germs on their hands

C.J. Smith said...

Invest in some Purell. Buy some gloves.

Squiggles said...

I take the PATH in the morning because it is the path (hee) of least resistance. And it let's me stop to get coffee. At night, I will ONLY take it if it is ice storming or a monsoon.

What I do not understand is why they can't use their forearms. I do it all the time mostly because hands are full or lately, my mittens are not on and it is cold.

Anonymous said...

I'll open the closed door that nobody wants to use, and I push/pull it open regardless of who is in the way. I don't give a f**k. I don't go out of my way to hurt someone, I actually am careful when I do it. But if you are too lazy to use that door, and too stupid to stay out of the way of it, then tough.

If they have a problem with it, tough. I don't stay around to engage the lazy f**ks.

Michael Suddard said...

The only better feeling than resolving this door donkey situation yourself, is when someone ahead of you does it for you.

Happened to me two weeks ago at the mall entrance from the main downtown bus station here in Ottawa. Even got a friendly smile from the guy in front of me after I said "thank you" as we moved forward.

It's awesome when you notice others are as sensible as you also live in this world.

Tal Hartsfeld said...

Good thing The Who wasn't performing at this station.
Someone could've been killed even ("All eggs go into one basket").

TomW said...

Related note: don't stand on both sides of an escalator.