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Wednesday, October 9, 2013

Half-Pint

from: Christian (c.graham5157@hotmail.com)
to: cj@thiscrazytrain.com
date: Tue, Oct 8, 2013 at 1:56 PM
subject: Your problem with smokers

Hello C.J.
So a colleague stumbled onto your blog when actually looking up where people were allowed to smoke at GO stations when he pointed out one of your posts to me. We both believe you really feel you are justified and entitled as much as the smokers you hate when you declared you'd be willing to shove a bullhorn in their ears and scare them with your no smoking announcements. We all work in law here where I am and I can tell you without a doubt that is harrassment, especially if you were to damage the hearing of one of these people. Oh, we read ALL about your asthma and other health issues and you may think a smoker is risking your health but not so much as you shouting at 50 Dbs in their ear. You are OUTSIDE and you can move away from cigarette smoke. The platforms are large enough. Better yet, how about you stand or wait in the parking lot? The bottom line is smoking was the norm for well over 100 years before the governments decided that people could no longer think for themselves. Not everyone who smokes, gets cancer. My grandparents, all four of them, smoked from teenagers to their 80s and 90s and all died from old age. People know the risks. They don't need Big Brother. It's gone so far that no one can enjoy a cigarette with dinner in a restaurant, yet, we have to put up with people like you, with your disease, coughing into our food. Germs are just as bad as toxins. Look at SARS and H1N1. Smokers weren't to blame.
The government can legislate all they want, the only way to make anything smoke-free is to ban cigarettes entirely. And may I point out that the pollutants generated by the bus, train and cars are far more toxic to you than cigarette smoke.

from: Cj Smith
to: c.graham5157@hotmail.com
date: Wed, Oct 9, 2013 at 8:56 AM
subject: Re: Your problem with smokers

Dear Christian,

When I was 9, I was given a book, the first in a series, called Little House on the Prairie. I imagined how amazing it must have been to live 100 years ago and have a "Ma" and "Pa" and go to school in a one-room schoolhouse and roam wide open fields with my arms spread wide and sleep in a dress and hat. I even asked my dad if he would call me "Half Pint". I told all my friends to call me Half-Pint. Only one ever did and that was Alex. Alex loved Little House on the Prairie as much as I did and he decided I was to call him Albert. So we would walk down to Bloor Street calling each other Albert and Half-Pint and talk about Mr. Edwards and Nellie Olsen. Not that you're probably familiar with the books, but I think I'm going to call you Willie from now on. If you write me back, be sure to call me Half-Pint or else we're done here.

Seriously, though, were you high when you wrote this email? Remember, Half-Pint or no deal.

39 comments:

April said...

It is very easy for someone to say "I work in law" and tell you that you are wrong.

I would suggest that you communicate directly with your lawyer cats because although "I work in law" I do not hold a law degree. However, the Criminal Code of Canada defines criminal harassment as:

264. (1) No person shall, without lawful authority and knowing that another person is harassed or recklessly as to whether the other person is harassed, engage in conduct referred to in subsection (2) that causes that other person reasonably, in all the circumstances, to fear for their safety or the safety of anyone known to them.

Prohibited conduct

(2) The conduct mentioned in subsection (1) consists of

(a) repeatedly following from place to place the other person or anyone known to them;

(b) repeatedly communicating with, either directly or indirectly, the other person or anyone known to them;

(c) besetting or watching the dwelling-house, or place where the other person, or anyone known to them, resides, works, carries on business or happens to be; or

(d) engaging in threatening conduct directed at the other person or any member of their family.

Calling out smokers on a blowhorn (provided it isn't directly in their ears, which I don't ever remember being your intent - "in their faces" and in their ears are two very different things) would, in fact, not meet this defintion of harassment.

The smokers wouldn't have a reasonable fear for their safety, you wouldn't be repeatedly doing this, you aren't going to their homes and you aren't following them from place to place. It doesn't meet the definition.

Christian should hang up his armchair law degree and go back under his troll bridge.

TT said...

I weep for the human race when I read stuff like this guy's email.

vrs said...

If they really worked "in law" they would know there is a bylaw about not smoking on Go transit property...took me two seconds to find it by googling "Go transit Bylaws Smoking"
http://www.gotransit.com/public/en/docs/bylaws/ByLaw2.pdf

section 3.33: no person shall smoke in corporation property, except in areas designated as smoking areas. (the platforms are CLEARLY signed as no smoking......)

and if you want to stretch it section 3.24 - no littering (aka cigarette butts)

So Christian how about you go stand in the parking lot and smoke instead of making CJ do it.

VRS (who also chooses to smoke in the parking lot our of respect for others)

MATT said...

They used to use cocaine to relieve nasal congestion in the 1940s...just because something was acceptable before doesn't mean it's good for you today.

C.J. Smith said...

As you can see Christian, I really didn't need to write you a reply as there are people way more knowledgeable than me who will poke holes in your story!

Skin MAn said...

half-pint

LOL's

Sean said...

A message to those who smoke in designated non-smoking areas: A little respect for others and for rules goes a long way in a public space. Thank you.

AllanVS said...

I want to take Christian, and do as Trevor (in GTAV) did to one of his 'hostages' ... rip his teeth out with a rusty set of pliers, beat the crap out of him with a 48" monkey wrench, and attach clips to a car battery and put them on Christian's Nipples.

No, Christian, you DO NOT have a right to smoke on the platform, or any other GO property. That is against the law. Not only is it against GO By-Laws, but also against Smoke Free Ontario laws.

So go shove your head up your mo&%#$ f&*%ing a&% you %&#)%* #(*#@@ (%&*@($@ (%*&(@@ !!!

Squiggles said...

Oddly enough, I had a young lady come up to me on Saturday and ask if it was permissible to smoke on the platforms as she didn't see any signs.

Explained that there is no smoking on any GO property, and that the signs were missing at Ajax because they were still working on the newly opened platform.

There still are decent smoking people amongst us.

Christian is just an ass.

Peter said...

Well, Christian, you have my vote for the Tool of the Day Award. Let’s look closer at your assertion that “shouting at 50 Dbs in their ear” is harassment. Christian, the abbreviation for decibel is “dB”, not “Db”. Do you suffer from dyslexia-like symptoms?

Did you reference a decibel comparison chart before bothering CJ, Christian? Let Mr. Google suggest one, like: http://www.gcaudio.com/resources/howtos/loudness.html

Now, Christian, please follow along closely, because this is important. From the chart, 50 dB falls somewhere between “Whisper Quiet Library at 6'” and “Normal conversation at 3'”. Christian, can you share with us legal precedents where that is considered “harassment”?

Christian, I do hope your resume is up-to-date.

What a tool!

Jack C. said...

I don't even know where to begin with the specious reasoning in Christian's e-mail. "Not everyone who smokes, gets cancer." I won't even touch the comma misplacement. The comment is roughly analogous to saying "Not everyone who plays Russian Roulette gets a bullet in the brain." If my grandfather had survived several games Russian Roulette in 1960s, would that make the case that Russian Roulette is a safe, acceptable activity in which to engage in 2013?

The idea that smoking bans are part of some "Big Brother in mah bidness" social policy are so deluded there's no reasoning with them. Big Brother doesn't give a shit what you do to your body, although I suppose Big Brother is funding the consequences in the form of health care.

I don't want to breathe your noxious fumes. Not on a train platform. Not in a restaurant. Not in a box. Not with a fox. I do not like your smoke, my man. I do not like it, Chist-I-An. I do not like it here or there. I do not like it anywhere. Dumbass.

Anonymous said...

Someone throw this Christian dude onto the tracks and let the train do its work

deepfish said...

...and his last point is in error as well. Numerous studies have shown that butt-smoke beats vehicle exhaust exponentially when it comes to: particulate matter and other allergens and irritants; carcinogens; carbon-monoxide content; and persistence in the air.
He must have taken an extra beat with a stupid-wand to get that wrong about so much stuff. If he's in law enforcement he must get to ride in the clown car a lot.

Anonymous said...

AMEN Christian...AMEN!!!

Lori said...

I just love how he says you are outside and can move away from the smoke, not!!! For someone in law he sure doesn't understand what the hell a by-law is. So while it is true you are outside and can move, you shouldn't have to. And I don't recall you saying anything about using that bullhorn in peoples ears.

Christian said...

Since you are all so PARTICULAR with my spelling and punctuation, I did notice that C.J. wasn't consistent with her use of the hyphen in Half Point.
And all of you can blow me. Thanks.

Anonymous said...

Christian, you're probably the most ignorant person ever, you can't smoke wherever you please, I'd love to see you light a smoke up in a building or on public transit since you think you're so smart and know everything, you wouldn't get away with it just like smoking near other people. There's health risk and your toxic air can make other people sick.
My mind is just blown away that you're some old dude and such an ignorant idiot. Please break all the rules an see how far it got you in life. You should probably Practice what you preach, because right now you just seem like a stupid fuck who doesn't have a clue. Ever smoke around me and you'd see what would happen to you. Smarten up, idiot

Anonymous said...

Let's face it; you CAN smoke anywhere on GO Transit so Christian, light up! Smoke if you got 'em. GO Transit now has an appearant policy of not enforcing the smoking rules anywhere. I was on a train last week - LSE 19:13 where two people were smoking . I went to the CSR who said, and I quote, "What do you want me to do about it?". I was so shocked I just walked away. Yesterday, Union Station platform, a woman was smoking outside the doors of the 5:53 LSE. Up came the Transit officer. Did he make her put it out? No, he bummed a cigarette off of her and walked away. She got on the train reeking of smoke so bad I changed cars. It's all over now. Smoke on.

C.J. Smith said...

Half Point?
OH MY GOD. GET IT RIGHT!!!
That's it, the deal is OFF.

PS. Please write more comments. Your wisdom is such a shining light in what is very dark times for smokers.

Fusk said...

It's 'Half-Pint', you moron!

MATT said...

I feel like such a moron; I've been going OUTSIDE to smoke for so many years, and I could have done it at my desk because if the non-smokers don't like it, they should just move???

Sweet Christmas Baby Jesus...do you know what this means? It means that the world officially REVOLVES AROUND ME!!!

YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS....

Whether you believe the medical evidence or not about second-hand smoke (and I happen to believe it), the fact that you think you can smoke wherever the hell you feel like it and have everyone else suffer for it, is just about as ignorant as a person can be. That's akin to blaring music on your iPhone, while taking a dump on the seat of a rush-hour GO Train that is full of passengers. Too bad if they're offended by your choice of tunes, or the aroma of your feces right? I mean, you have the RIGHT to listen to bad music, and the RIGHT and take a dump when nature calls.

Christian, get a fucking clue.

Anonymous said...

Christian, for someone who works in law your spelling, grammar, and typing are terrible. You do know, as you work in law, that the placement of a comma can change the meaning of a sentence. I am going to guess that when you say "I work in law" what you really meant was - I am a rent a cop and think I know the law.

Bicky said...

I have a friend who suffers from COPD and never smoked a day in her life.

Tell me to move when you're clearly in a no smoking zone and the gloves will come off. Unless it's really cold outside, then I've gotta keep 'em on.

Ignorant tools like this guy make me want to send him to Singapore for some justice.

Peter said...

Christian,
Seeing as CJ has given you the green light to comment at will, why don't you seize the moment and advertise the full name, address, and telephone number of your legal firm? Opportunities like this don't come along every day, you know!

Al said...

I have recently been to singapore. People smoke anywhere and everywhere.

Anonymous said...

Hey Christian,

If she comes along with a bull horn, you are outside, you can move away from the loud noise.


Hmmm...that seems like a familiar argument......



Christian said...

My name is there. Use your brains idiots.

Anonymous said...

http://www.linkedin.com/pub/christian-graham/31/4a0/7b2

Anonymous said...

http://www.linkedin.com/pub/christian-j-graham/3a/202/506

Ravi T said...

Coming to Toronto for a visit and googling where you can smoke? Interesting. It all makes sense now.

deepfish said...

A Florida Lawyer.

'nuff said.

AllanVS said...

Sure they smoke. But how much litter is on the ground? When I was there in 2002, I saw a guy CANED ONTHE STREET, for missing the garbage bin.

Bicky said...

When I said "send him to Singapore for some justice", I meant that they have a zero tolerance policy for infractions. I remember a story of a tourist sentenced to caning for spitting gum on the sidewalk.

AllanVS at 10:11pm proves my point.

We're so blasé about stuff these days, our streets are dirty, there's feet on seats after being in who knows what cesspool... no respect for others... *smh*

George said...

Yay another loser trying to be a tough guy.

Another fun day.

C.J. Smith said...

*Willie* has been banned from the comments. Moving along...

Al said...

Who's Willie?

George said...

I love the 50dB part. Another moron who doesn't have a clue as to how the decibel scale works.
people showing their ignorance in public without a shred of awareness is always highly amusing to me.
Thanks there Christian buddy, now can you tell us where you work so nobody accidentally pays for your particular brand of genius?
FYI 50 dB is quieter than normal conversation, but you already knew that right?

Loser.

calvinhc said...

Christian said, "The bottom line is smoking was the norm for well over 100 years..."

If that makes is right, then I guess there are a lot of other things that should be right as well. Things like slavery and no votes or property ownership for women.

David Cowan said...

"It's gone so far that no one can enjoy a cigarette with dinner in a restaurant"

When one person enjoys a cigarette with dinner in a restaurant, everyone else has to "enjoy" that cigarette with them...