Search ThisCrazyTrain.com

Monday, March 19, 2012

The following conversation is real


Today

By Telephone

Yours Truly with random GO Customer Care representative

Long-winded pre-recorded introductory message.
Repeat long-winded pre-recorded introductory message in french.

Hit "0"

Waiting ...


GO: Good day, (name withheld) speaking. How may I help you?

CJ: Oh hi, I'm calling because I want to discuss the thermostat configuration within your coaches.

GO: Sorry?

CJ: It's too hot in the trains.

GO: Oh, I'm sorry to hear that. We are having rather unusual warm weather.

CJ: Yes, unexpected for March, I know, but I'm curious, when the temperature is set for the coaches, don't the CSAs or the conductor lick their index finger and stick it out the window and gauge the weather? Who the heck thought it was a good idea to set the thermostats to "broil"?

GO: (Chuckling...) Well no, that's not how it works, they would have an idea of the temperature outside.

CJ: My concern is that last week it was so hot on the train I was on, that I nearly passed out. Then I was told that the coaches are set by some Oompa Loompas in some magical yard to 22C. Is that true? Because that's way too hot. I don't even set my home furnace to that.

GO: I'm not sure how the interior temperature is established but you can always visit the CSA in the accessibility coach to mention your discomfort.

CJ: No dice. That didn't work last week so I am calling. In advance. I'm concerned about this Wednesday. It's supposed to be 26C.

GO: Can I ask what train you take? What line?

CJ: Lakeshore East.

GO: Do you remember what day exactly and the time it was too hot?

CJ: March 13th. 5:10 LSE. Heat was CRANKED. I even tweeted the GO Transit Twitter hamster. I know it's a hamster, because after my tweet, the wheel stopped spinning. Hamster was dead. Ask it a question that requires an answer. Boom! Road kill.

GO: (Silence)

CJ: So ... do you think, in this modern age, you can do me a HUGE favour and make sure the crew of today's 5:10 LSE sets the thermostat at 18C and actually switches to cool air. Not hot air?

GO: You're actually serious?

CJ: Yes. Can I have your word? Pretend you're a medieval knight and not the kind that do that fake jousting at the CNE while people shove chicken legs into their mouths. A real knight. Like Mel Lastman in that movie.

GO: Uh ... don't you mean Mel Gibson and he wasn't a knight. I'm pretty sure he was a soldier.

CJ: Whatever. But he kept his word, right?! We shall have our freedom and all that. Well, I want my freedom to be air conditioning.

GO: (Laughing ... ) You made my day. Just for you, I will see what I can do. Okay?

CJ: I just want my ride home to be comfortable.

GO: Absolutely. It would be my honour.

Other pleasantries exchanged as well as personal info.

He thought I was kidding when I said I'd be bringing a thermometer on board to hold him to his promise.


UPDATE!!!

So (name withheld) got back to me and as it turns out all the trains are pre-programmed to a set temperature and can not be adjusted until March 20th - the first official day of Spring.

Until then, we must all suffer.

I can not explain why or how other commuters managed to get CSAs to adjust the temperatures in coaches but it is apparently true that at the service/maintenace yard, the thermostats are set to a pre-programmed temperature that can't be changed until a certain date. Similar, said the CSA, to how buildings have a schedule.

Again, this the first time the system has had to deal with summer temperatures in what is essentially winter. There's no mandate in place because no one ever thought it would get this hot.

Bring water. Dress in layers. Think cool thoughts.

UPDATE #2!!!

So apparently, on the 4:10 LSE, the air conditioning is running as I received two text messages from two different people in two different coaches that the train is blowing cold air.

Ok, (name withheld), I'm coming to collect. I don't know what I'm collecting. But it will be something.

23 comments:

Anonymous said...

Finally!
I was wondering what happened to the CJ we all know and have come to love.

C.J. Smith said...

What happened to me?

Dakota said...

Thank you CJ. The train has been too hot lately. Hopefully it will be cooler tonight.

Also, before Bicky mentions it you have a typo...
... a medieval night...

Thanks for the laugh.

C.J. Smith said...

FIXED!!!

Anonymous said...

OMG thanks. Totally what I needed. You made my day!

Anonymous said...

I too am on the 5:10 and so welcome the comfortable temperatures, and say THANK YOU for making that call, and his day! :) (I took an earlier train on Friday and thought the heat was going to kill me - was down to a tank top and still had sweat pouring down my back - that does not make me feel pretty at all!)

Squiggles said...

Thank You! I just hope you got his name, because if nothing happens, you have someone you can talk to again.

I am on all different trains going home at night - mostly the 5:10 but with a bunch of 5:20s, 5.53s and for fun, 6:18s for the last week and for many more to come.

I will say that on all of them, first thing I do is strip off my coat or sweater because it is pretty much set to "Hell". Doesn't matter which coach. But with a lot more people packed onto the end coaches, the heat is even worse.

With this warmth, I don't want to start wearing layers, just so I can strip down and still be decent on the trip home.

C.J. Smith said...

So (name withheld) got back to me and as it turns out all the trains are pre-programmed to a set temperature and can not be adjusted until March 21st - the first official day of Spring.

Until then, we must all suffer.

I can not explain why or how other commuters managed to get CSAs to adjust the temperatures in coaches but it is apparently true that at the service/maintenace yard, the thermostats are set to a pre-programmed temperature that can't be changed until a certain date. Similar, said the CSA, to how buildings have a schedule.

Again, this the first time the system has had to deal with summer temperatures in what is essentially winter. There's no mandate in place because no one ever thought it would get this hot.

Bring water. Dress in layers. Think cool thoughts.

C.J. Smith said...

The hell?
Just received 2 text msgs that cold air is blowing on 4:10 LSE.

Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
FRED said...

I see our resident troll finally paid his internet bill.

Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Bicky said...

I was on a day off today... sorry I missed that typo, and the scorching hot trains.

Thankfully, the 21st of March is Wednesday when it's supposed to hit 26C (humidex 30C). Let's hope the coaches are cool.

C.J. Smith said...

Sorry, I need to correct my GO CSA guy. Tuesday is the first day of Spring. That's tomorrow!!! Winter is finally over!

GO CSA said...

Challenge accepted.

N-train said...

OMG. THIS is why this is my favourite blog. :'D Posts like this just make me laugh!

It's even been warm where I live! The principal at my school even adjusted uniform policy to the summer uniform starting tomorrow (usually it would start in May). Now, that REALLY says something.

Hope the trains stay at a comfortable temperature! Haha. :)

Dakota said...

The coach I was on yesterday on the 4:25 LSE was set to broil. I hope it is better today.

James said...

The 4:50 Milton line train was nice and cool yesterday.

TomW said...

GO is doing it WRONG! 22C is too hot, regardless of the time of year.
The thermostats should be set at a temperature that is comforatble the whole year round. 18C-20C would be good.

If anything, the thermostats should be set *lower* in winter, because people wear more clothes.

lswgirl13 said...

Ohhhhh, thanks for the laugh!!!

But pre-programmed therostats my ass!!! Would they use that excuse if it was suddenly freakishly freezing in September??? What happened to common sense?

Ben said...

I've noticed that the Viva buses have been uncomfortably warm recently. The other day there was a newborn in stroller who must have been miserable - not to mention the bus was overcrowded since it was about 30 minutes before they bring in rush hour frequency, making the environment difficult for everyone.

Today I didn't notice it as much though. Not sure if it was because they adjusted the temperature, it was more seasonal outside, or if I just got used to it. If it is warm again, I'll send them an email myself.

Squiggles said...

I found the train last night to not be as warm. But it did seem airless.

Hopefully, they figure something out soon.

Kelly said...

I think your called worked! The 4:53 train today was cool and comfortable. I could feel the air conditioning blowing! Thanks CJ!