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Tuesday, August 6, 2013

An epic meltdown in 5... 4... 3... 2...

from: Jesse
to: cj@thiscrazytrain.com
date: Sun, Aug 4, 2013 at 6:54 PM
subject:
Hey.
Seeing as you have nothing better to do than write comments on photos on instagram for people you don't know, I figure I would find the time in my BUSY life to tell you that there were no other people on the train so I wasn't taking a seat from someone and my shoes were on the seat but not on the seat. I did not make the seat dirty and as for hoping I was sitting in dog poop - who the hell do you think you are? What kind of person writes that to a complete stranger?! You need to get your head examined.

from: CJ Smith
to: Jesse
date: Sun, Aug 4, 2013 at 7:33 PM
subject:Re: (no subject)

Hi!
Wow, you're awfully defensive. I went back onto Instagram now that I am on a break from my shift at the soup kitchen to re-examine your photo and noticed you deleted it. If you felt you did nothing wrong, why delete it?
Look, maybe you don't know how hashtags (#) work. When you tagged your photo with #gotrain, this means anyone can find it when conducting a search for #gotrain on Instagram. If you didn't want all of the internets to see your photo, including complete strangers, don't tag it.
Feet, empty train or not, belong on the floor.
Thanks

from: Jesse
to: CJ Smith
date: Sun, Aug 4, 2013 at 7:35 PM
subject:Re: (no subject)

Hey asswipe
I know how hashtags work. That doesn't mean you had a right to comment. You're a bully. I hope someone punches you in the face. Don't email me again.

from: CJ Smith
to: Jesse
date: Sun, Aug 4, 2013 at 7:47 PM
subject:Re: (no subject)
Hi again,
I know you said not to email you but I'm confused. You emailed me. Is that not a written invitation to engage you? Can I ask how old you are?

from: Jesse
to: CJ Smith
date: Sun, Aug 4, 2013 at 7:48 PM
subject:Re: (no subject)
STOP EMAILING ME OR I WILL CONTACT THE POLICE.

from: CJ Smith
to: Jesse
date: Sun, Aug 4, 2013 at 7:49 PM
subject:Re: (no subject)
Well, that escalated quickly. Can I ask what you would tell the police? Let's say you were filling out the police report right now. In the area where it says "Describe what happened:" What would you write?

from: Jesse
to: CJ Smith
date: Sun, Aug 4, 2013 at 7:52 PM
subject:Re: (no subject)
FUCK OFF. I AM CALLING THE COPS RIGHT NOW.

from: CJ Smith
to: Jesse
date: Sun, Aug 4, 2013 at 8:04 PM
subject:Re: (no subject)
Have them call me. 905 442 7423 I've cleared my entire evening of petting and cuddling kittens and dogs at the local humane society so I can take the call. Later.

---
My phone never rang.

28 comments:

Anonymous said...

*yawn*
It's funny how defensive people get when they know they're in the wrong. There is no argument for putting your shoes on the seats. Period.
Go away Jesse, and keep your feet on the ground where they belong.

Anonymous said...

thank you, your blog brightens my day..whenever I need a good laugh I know where to go.

C.J. Smith said...

You come here anytime, sugar.

Skin Man said...

Ha! Love it!

cncndr said...

My god that is fucking funny, thanks for the laugh.

- Mike

AllanVS said...

I love your wit CJ.

C.J. Smith said...

You're all welcome!

Dan-1 said...

I'll do it for him.

"Describe what happened:

SOMEONE ON TEH INTERNETS HURT MY FEELINGS!!!1!"

Lori said...

911: Hello 911, do you need police, fire, or ambulance.
Jesse: Police.
911: What seems to be the problem?
Jesse: Some lady on the internet left a comment on my instagram telling me to keep my feet off the seats on the GO Train.
911: *click*

Later that evening Jesse was charged by the police for misusing 911.

Squiggles said...

@Lori, if only. We can dream though.

I have to admit, I love that instant when s/he realises that s/he is in the wrong and completely freaks out. Because freaking out is how you can justify being wrong.

And hopefully, in the future, s/he actually sits in the dog poopy seat.

Jesse said...

YOU ARE THE BIGGEST JERK. Ever.
Stay off my Instagram! And fuck off. You're not funny.
You're a rotten mean person.
And to think you built a whole website around this!!! I hope someone sues you some day. In fact, I hope GO Transit cleans you out so bad for trademark infringement for your stupid drawings that I see you panhandling on Bay Street so I can spit in your face.

C.J. Smith said...

^ And this is why This Crazy Train was born.

Anonymous said...

Jesse, now that you're here to read it:

Keep your feet off the seats Jesse.

Love, the people sitting around you on the train every day.

Anonymous said...

Jesse, why don't you go crawl back into your diapers and spend another 18 years growing up?

Anonymous said...

Sounds like Jesse's mom and dad never said no or you're wrong to him while he was growing up. Who says they would spit in a person's face? And all this venom over feet on the seats and a comment about being called out for what is a dirty habit?
Jesse, you need your own head examined.

Anonymous said...

it's people like Jesse that put the Crazy in This Crazy Train...lmao

Squiggles said...

The crazy is indeed strong in that one.

C.J. Smith said...

It's proving to be very antagonizing for Jesse to read the comments but not be able to have his responses published.
In one comment (deleted) he goes on (and on) about his education and university degrees. He seems extremely adamant that gets noted. Like that excuses anything, Jesse!
Keep writing, ain't nobody cares what you footrider has to say.
Ain't nobody!

Anonymous said...

I thought Jesse was a girl?

cncndr said...

Bit a swearing in this but it will get the message across.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1EY7lYRneHc

- Mike

C.J. Smith said...

Jesse, give me a call so I know if you're male or female. Peeps wanna know. Or, go write another comment that won't get published.

Dan-1 said...

You can be a Nobel peace prize winner for all I care, but if you put your dirty feet on the seats and act like you have when someone calls you out, you're nothing but a selfish, ignorant child with no sense of public decency and respect for others.

And that rates a lot higher than some paper degrees.

Lori said...

Hey CJ, you saying that in a deleted comment he/she is going on about his/her education and university degrees reminds me of this http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tgUq_Wdc898 I think this woman was talking loudly on a train and was asked several times to be quiet.

C.J. Smith said...

Love that video!

Quadtumbler said...

Entitled people like Jesse needs a stiff kick in the ass. Jesse, how's your inflated ego? College and University educated huh? They don't teach common sense there. But since your parents didn't give you the strap when you acted like a retard. (Note, I never call anyone mentally challenged a retard. A retard is a person who has no issues and still acts like a stupid kindengarden student.) But the bototm line, when someone calls you up on your BS they are a bully. Oh FYI you can't sue someone using Go Transit's name because it is owned by gasp* the taxpayers of Ontario. Crown Corperation, in other words grow up and suck it up buttercup. Take a good look in the mirror you cop calling SOB. (Man I hate it when wussbags have to use cops because they suck so bad at life they need to use the police to boost their pathetic egos. And maintain their entitled behaviour.) Education...people who can't get a job in their field brag about the education that they failed to use. (Again sucking at life.) This headach could of been prevented by....wait for it....putting your goddamn feet off the the bloody seat. You know how hard it is to clean leather pants, or how expensive it is to dryclean? Not even 30 and am hating on my generation and the one before. Lack of spanking me thinks because I got beat like a mule when required when I showed no common sense, and showed entitlement. But hell am a good person from it. Oh Jesse one more thing, seats are not for feet. Your Welcome

George said...

Wow, nothing like opening your mouth wide enough to stick your foot in it up to the kneecap.

Jesse you're an educated loser. Congrats on that, you must be very proud to be able to brag about your education and be a foot rider.

As my dear old granddad used to say, when the hole you're digging is too deep to get out of, stop digging and get out.

Bicky said...

Oh man, there's been a lot of comments I missed. Glad I came back to this post.

Jack C. said...

Back when I was in high school, we had a classmate who thought he was a really clever non-conformist. He saw himself as some sort of hero freedom fighter for refusing to follow rules and picking fights with teachers over petty shit. He failed to realize that he was actually the butt of a running joke to the students who actually wanted to get a good education, mostly liked their teachers, and were sick of his constant, narcissistic need to disrupt classes with his nonsense.

The really funny par was that he was also a coward. The "freedom fighter" rarely had the guts to stand up and accept consequences. He'd lie, cheat, and generally try to weasel out of serious trouble. Hardly the actions of some brave non-conformist. Others tried to explain to him that real protesters/freedom fighters pick serious injustices to protest (not the school dress code) and accept the consequences for fighting injustice with integrity and dignity.

Anyway, this kid one day announced in Politics class that he didn't have to listen to teachers or obey rules because he was, and I quote, "an anarchist." He drew the circled letter A over all his belongings.

So one day our Politics teacher got sick of his crap and asked him, "Do you even know what an anarchist is?" In a snotty, offended tone, he replied, "Yeah. Do you? You're just a power tripping douche." The teacher replied, "Oh yeah, smart guy? How about I take you out back and punch you in the face?"

The "anarchist" promptly turned to the rest of the class for support. "Did you guys hear that? He just threatened me! When I tell the principal, you're gonna get fired! My dad'll call the cops and have you arrested!" This from the ANARCHIST.

The next day, the principal came to class and asked if anyone had witnessed the teacher threatening the anarchist. Amazingly, nobody had seen or heard a thing. Our teacher threaten a student? Never!

Too bad nobody ever taught Jesse the same lesson.