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Wednesday, December 7, 2011

It's been some time ... since we've had some fire 'round here

You know, I used to have these warped fantasies of getting all He-Man and the Castle of Greyskull on people who put their crap on the seats while a train is boarding and make no attempt to acknowledge the train is filling with people, people whose tickets bought them a seat.

I don't care what it is you have. Purses, pets, shoes, jackets, bags, backpacks, an antique mirror (I no longer have that photo but damn, wish I kept it), Ikea purchases (rent a damn car for chrissakes) and all your luggage you're taking for your 1-week vacation to Varadero, Cuba have zero priority. Good for you. I hate your holiday already. Don't make me see it, too.

My dad has a firetruck horn. It's de-commisioned but it's the one that goes "MUH BWRUH MUH" real loud. I can hook it up to a 9-volt battery to make it work. I watched enough Bill Nye the Science Guy to know what to do. Then I'd consult a few episodes of MacGuyver and fashion up a button from a popsicle stick and a tab from a pop can and use that to activate it. I'd stand right in front of these clowns - such as the one shown below whose cupcakes, according to Kathy, rode comfortably this morning all the way from Clarkson to Union on a packed train - and let it rip.

No one asked Cupcake Girl to move. No one.


The hell is wrong with you people?

Maybe she's hoping all those cupcakes will bring all the boys to her yard but all they make me want to bring is a blowtorch.


LIKE A BOSS.

18 comments:

ExGOnowTTC said...

@CJ
Sorry, but i think this a complete lack of respect and decency. Isn't it obvious these cupcakes are heading to the funeral of the lone cupcake left in the carpark the other day?

Anonymous said...

I'm ttc, and when there are a few seats to choose from, I will always ask the person who is trying to block the seat beside them with their bags/legs/whatever. I feel like I'm sticking it to them. :)

FRED'S WIFE said...

You forgot slide 3. The pile of ash left on the seat after you toated her cupcakes.

Squiggles said...

@ Anon: I used to do the same thing when I took the TTC! And with GO, if I get to the platform late (haha) I will choose a seat that someone placed their crap on. But, because I have this thing about being on time, I am at the train doors before they open.

Anonymous said...

Perhaps it was the smell from the nasty boots that kept people from asking her to move the box.

Ashley said...

And she's also taking up the accessible seating. Tsk Tsk.

Vanessa said...

I rode the GO Train on Halloween with two reusable grocery bags filled with food for lunch and another bag filled with wine, and I still put all three bags under my seat (how I managed it, I still don't know). So why this young lady feels the need to give her cupcakes an entire seat baffles me.

I hate to say that I love the container. Hatin' on the girl. Why didn't anyone say something?!?

lswgirl13 said...

Anon@12:44 - I was thinking the same thing about the "nasty boots". I wish I had the guts to say something but I never do which is so stupid because it's the other person who is the inconsiderate moron. How is it that so many people are so void of any common sense?

Kathy said...

I'm at a total loss to understand why people don't say anything in these situations. I totally get the "I shouldn't have to" argument, but if we only did the things we "had" to do we'd be living in a different world altogether. Fact is, we all shape the world we live in and that includes showing people the consequences of their actions when it's called for. We teach people how to treat us, after all.

Sorry but people who continually allow stuff like this to happen, who feel that they "shouldn't have to say anything" are enablers. And in my eyes enablers are partially responsible for the ongoing bad behaviour we see around us.

What's worse, complacency is contagious.

Svej said...

If I were really bold I would sit on those cupcakes. And after I had thoroughly destroyed them with the weight of my ass, I would say something like "oops sorry, I didn't see your fucking cupcakes occupying the seat which was designed for humans. Better luck next time. Bitch." Idk, something like that, as you can see I am a very bitter person. Just not bold enough.

P.S. Nasty boots indeed.

C.J. Smith said...

Thank you Svej, for that awesome LOL!

ExGOnowTTC said...

Can you please not call the cupcakes 'fucking cupcakes'? Sheesh, show some respect!

Svej said...

;D Right right, sorry I forgot it was a cupcake funeral. But when people occupy seats with their stuff on a busy train I just get so ANGRY AND VULGAR I can't help myself.

McDarver said...

My first thought was ... eeewwwww - sweatie butt germs are on that seat and they're crawling all over the nice 'food container' ~ Karma is such a b*tch

Todd said...

Even with no cupcakes I wouldn't sit there. I find those seats a little too snugly for my comfort.

Anonymous said...

Excellent comment Kathy.

Anonymous said...

New rock name ....The Flaming Cupcakes. Awesomesauce with a smattering of blowtorch. Your the best at give me a smile on my face.

Anonymous said...

Someone should lift her skirt up.